Nothing special’s really been going on with me this month. I’ve been playing a lot of music lately, and totally slacking off on getting my reviews done again. I have to get through seven reviews in the next two days. I should start on them tonight, but I’m really just not feeling it lately. I’m not feeling like doing much of anything honestly. Depression has become a constant state for me. So much so in fact, that it just feels normal now. I’ve forgotten what it feels like to not feel this way. I have my good days and my bad days. Mostly I just want to sleep all the time. I wish something would change, because I’ve been trying to figure out for years how to make it change, and I can’t come up with anything.
Had a good friend I haven’t seen for ages now come for a short visit. It was great hanging out with him, but our time was so limited, we really didn’t get to do much. Still, we made use of the time we had. Played music, watched movies, went out for a drink, etc…. He’s the only offline friend I’ve got, so only getting to see him for such a short time after all this time really sucks. Now it’s back to my stale old life again.
On top of that, my wife’s going home to visit her family in Israel for a couple of weeks, so I’ll be totally alone here. Just me and the dogs. No where to go, nothing to do. I’m really sick of my life. I don’t even find any real joy in the things I used to enjoy doing anymore. I just don’t know what to do about it. I keep waiting for something really positive to happen that will drag me out of this funk, but one day is like the next, is like the next, and so on.
Sorry this post was such a downer. That’s just my life and the way I’m feeling at the moment.(Current Mood: sad)