B-Movie Central Cheese Blog

I have someone talking to me now on MSN messenger, and I have absolutely no friggin’ clue who it is.  The e-mail address looks familiar, but after talking to them for like 20 minutes now, I still have no freakin’ clue who it is.  I probably won’t know either because I don’t feel like asking.  I guess it’s someone I used to play a game called Silkroad with.
God I’m hungry.  I slept half the day and now I woke up and I’m hungry.  Not sure what I want though.  I’ll probably just go get myself some extra sour french bread.  I swear, I could live on that, especially when it’s nice and fresh.

Still thinking about Pumpkin.  Every time I walk out there my first instinct is to grab a couple of carrots to shove through the bars of his cage for him.  It’s always hard losing a pet.  A little piece of your life that you got used to is suddenly gone.  Depending on the emotional attachment you had, it can range from sadness all the way to depression that stops you from functioning.  I wasn’t overly emotionally attached to Pumpkin.  In fact, he was an annoying little bitch sometimes.  Funny thing is though, I miss him.  I missed Muffin when we lost him too.  It passes, but the initial sadness of it still has a hold of me.

I need to wake up.  I got the funk goin’ really bad today.  I was up way late every night this weekend and not doing anything I needed to do.  Now I got today and tomorrow to get stuff done, and most of today is gone already.

I’ve been feeling kind of down lately.  Going through one of those periods where I’ve been feeling like nothing works for me.  Hopefully I’ll get out of it before it gets too bad.  I just need something good to happen for me for a change.  It’s been a long time since anything genuinely good has happened, and yet, all of life’s annoyances seem to remain a constant.

Oh well, I need something to eat and I need to wake up, so that’s it for now.

One of our guinea pigs, Muffin, had to be put to sleep about a month and a half ago or so and today our other guinea pig, Pumpkin, died apparently of natural causes. Sharon found him dead in his cage this afternoon. After an unsuccessful attempt to bury him in the back yard, which I couldn’t do because the ground was too hard and rocky, we finally had to settle for sending him out in the trash. I hate doing that but I can’t think of anything else to do with him. It was depressing losing both of them. We weren’t anywhere near as emotionally attached to them as we are to our dogs, but still, they were living things and they were cute and furry and we’ll miss them both.

Now, with that said, I got some stuff I wanna bitch about…

First, I sleep for a few hours every day from about 9:30 am to 12:30 pm. I don’t know why, but I just get really tired around that time and I need to sleep for a few hours. Now on Friday, I was just dozing off when some utterly brainwashed and clueless bitch calls me because she wants to share some happy things from the bible with me. I got so much to bitch about here I don’t even know where to start! First of all, it’s not bad enough these idiots come to my door randomly, making me stop what I’m doing just so I can tell them to go to hell, but now I got the friggin’ idiots calling me on the phone too! And while I’m trying to sleep no less! Second, what in the friggin’ hell makes you idiots think I want to hear stuff out of the bible??? If I was interested in the bible, which I’m not, I’d read the damn thing myself. I don’t need some idiot calling me up on the phone, waking my ass up just to tell me some crap I wouldn’t listen to even if you tied me to a chair and hooked electrodes to my testicles and tried to force me to. Plus, if I was interested and I had read the damn book, then I’d already know what she was planning on telling me anyway, so why would anyone feel the need to make these kinds of dumb ass phone calls?

So anyway, since I’m a nice guy, rather than tell the dunce I’m a satanist, I tell her I’m an atheist. Both are true, but atheist is the milder of the two, so I decided to air on the side of being less harsh. Anyway, so I tell her that and she asks me if I mind if she asks what made me an atheist or some crap like that. I can’t remember exactly how she put it, but I was like, “Look, I’m not going to discuss religion with you.” So we ended the call. Basically, I could beat the moron over the heal all day long about the hypocrisies, contradictions and flat out nonsense in the bible and with religion in general, but it wouldn’t have even made a dent in that shield of brainwashing she had surrounding her, plus I was tired so I just didn’t want to bother. If she had caught me in a mood though, I’d have totally gone off on that whole rant. I just wish these idiots would learn to live and let live and keep their religious BS to themselves. They walk around with this mistaken thought that everyone wants to hear that crap and it’s just not the case.

Speaking of religion, if I hear one more person say, “Well, I’m more spiritual than religious,” they’re gonna get a beat down of biblical proportions. What the hell does that mean anyway? What the hell does it mean to be spiritual? Does that mean you like to drink a lot? Christ, at least if they drank a lot, it might make them a little bit interesting. It’s like being religious without all the pomp and ceremony. You know what that says to me? HIPPIES! Filthy ass stinky pot smokin’ free love havin guitar strummin’ no showin’ stinkin’ up the damn place bastards!

Oh and speaking of hippies, I had a thought today. Why is it that all these hippie bastards who don’t want you to be able to smoke a cigarette or a cigar or whatever, are all for you being able to smoke pot whenever and wherever you want to? How friggin’ hypocritical is that? Isn’t it funny too how they’re all for free speech and bitching about their right to say what they want, whenever they want, but as soon anyone says anything they don’t agree with, they vilify that person, shout them down, or do whatever they can to stifle that person’s opinions so that no one else can hear them. God, I despise hypocritical people.

Now, today was Memorial Day, so I hope while you were all out at your sales and having your barbecues and what not, you spent at least a few moments appreciating all the brave men and women who’ve given their lives so that you could be living the life you are. My father was a soldier in the Korean War, and while he made it back alive, many of the people he served with didn’t. Remember those people and all the soldiers both past and present who’ve given their lives in the service of this country, and appreciate what you have and the loved ones you have around you, because the families of those who have died for us no longer have their loved ones around them. All they have are the memories they keep in their hearts and whatever little mementos were left behind.

So the next time you feel like bitching about your life, think about those who no longer have a life to bitch about so that you could bitch about yours, and maybe your life will suddenly seem not so bad after all.

That’s it for now. I’m sure I’ll come up with something new to bitch about soon.

Oh man, she knocked it out of the park tonight. She brought her A game and Blake only brought about his C game. Jordin’s got this year’s American Idol all wrapped up after tonight. I can’t wait to hear her first real album. Not the one that idiot Clive whathisname from AI will produce, but the first real album she has input on. The AI winners’ first albums always suck because that guy sticks them with crappy songs that don’t even match their style. He’s gotta be one of the worst producers ever. Kelly Clarkson’s first album sucked, so did Katherine McPhee’s, Taylor Hicks’, etc… Fortunately, I think by the second album they start getting to have their input into the songs and it’s production and it comes out better.

Anyway, Jordin did just phenomenal tonight. I’m so happy for her. YAY JORDIN!

I was just reading a story about a teenager in high school who had been receiving death threats from a fellow student. His parents went into the school and bitched them out about it and they did absolutely nothing. Finally the kid took matters into his own hands, tagged the guy and put him on the ground in a submission hold. Now he’s suspended for the rest of the year while absolutely nothing is happening to the kid who made the threats. Now can someone please explain to me why ANY of these school officials still have a job?

The other day I read a story about a girl in high school who got suspended for a day and had to take three days of drug counseling because she had a Tylenol in her purse. I’ve heard many similar instances of this happening to other students as well. I’ve also heard of kids being suspended for having a butter knife in their lunchbox and kindergarteners being accused of sexual harassment for touching girls on the playground.

Just what the hell has happened to this world, and how the hell did all these hand-wringing wussies end up in charge of teaching the children? They all need to be taken out, given a good ass kickin’ and then put into jobs that don’t require any intelligence at all, since they obviously can’t seem to manage to scrape up even a couple of IQ points between the lot of them. They’re destroying the future generations with an idiocy that knows no bounds, and it has to stop. But they’re not the only ones. They have help from some parents who are just as stupid as they are.

Speaking of parents, they do a lot of stuff that irritates the hell out of me too. For example, all these idiots who make their kids wear bicycle helmets. You know you’re making your kids look like dorks right? Why not just play it completely safe and make them wear the helmets permanently so they don’t bang their heads when they walk around the house. You know how those walls can jump out at you when you least expect it!

Look, when I was a kid, there weren’t any damn bicycle helmets. I rode my bike to Hell and back a thousand times and so did all my friends. Sure we crashed once in a while. That’s what kids do on bikes. A few bumps and scrapes with a little bit of pain to go along with it only makes you smarter…and that’s the problem.

All these idiots who want to protect people from every possible thing in life are serving no other purpose than to make people dumber by taking away their learning experiences. Pain is a good teacher. If you try to jump your bike over something and you wipe out and get scraped up, there’s a pretty good chance you’ll either learn to do it better or learn that it’s beyond your abilities and leave it alone. Kids who pick on other kids and bully them should be beaten by the kids they’re bullying, because a good beating is the best teacher for those kinds of people. People who tell their kids not to fight and not to stand up for themselves are just setting their kids up to be victims in life. What the hell kind of a lesson is that?

Then you have all these idiots who don’t punish or control their children. They laugh at them when they misbehave like they’re just the cutest little scamp ever. Then the rotten little bastards grow up thinking they can do whatever they want and treat people like crap and get away with it. Again, pain is a good lesson for kids. A good swat on the ass once in a while to straighten them out, as long as it doesn’t go past that to the point of being abusive, is a good lesson for kids. I got a two year old nephew who could use a few hand prints on his ass, but he never gets them. I won’t let him in my house because he’s just unbelievably misbehaved and no one ever does anything about it. When I was two or three I threw a temper tantrum and my mom had had enough and she tanned my ass. Did I continue to throw temper tantrums? Hell no! Why the hell would I want to risk getting spanked again? Again, pain was a good teacher. She didn’t abuse me or spank me constantly, but she didn’t have to. I got the point, and I never did it again. Back in the old days they’d take misbehaved kids out to the woodshed and lay into them with a switch. Funny how kids back then were so much better behaved than they are now, isn’t it?

The list of things all the wussies of this world try to protect us from goes on and on and seems to be never ending, and to all of you whiny bastards, I only have one thing to say. Unfortunately, I don’t have a middle finger smiley, but then again, I’m pretty sure I don’t need one for you all to get how I feel about these idiots.

There was a funny line from a Dimitri Martin comedy bit I saw the other day. He was interviewing some life coach and finding out what she does and what not. Then he went and talked to some old guy and asked him how they ever made it through his generation without life coaches. The guy’s all, “Well Dimitri, I guess it’s because my generation wasn’t full of PUSSIES!”

Truer words were never spoken. So to all you pussies out there, grow a pair and start living life the way it was meant to be lived instead of trying to protect everyone else from themselves. What anyone else does is none of your damn business anyway. Jerks!

Ignorance is bliss only to the ignorant. To those of us who think for ourselves and actually look into things before we decide how to feel about it, the ignorant are nothing more than an uninformed collective of sheep, being led around by manipulating, propagandizing sheepherders.

Step one of the indoctrination of the ignorant comes with the infusion of religion on kids from the time they’re old enough to understand the spoken word. They’re brainwashed with their parent’s religious beliefs from birth and then dragged off to church where some ignorant religious leader who thinks it’s his god given obligation to tell the masses how to live, rams the religious talking points home. As the child’s brain develops and their synaptic patterns form, they’re told to believe everything the church and their parents tell them because they’re right and everyone who thinks differently is wrong and is going to Hell.

Then these kids go to school, where children are no longer taught reading, writing, math, science and history, as they should be. Now we have classrooms full of young minds trapped in rooms being brainwashed by whatever social or political agenda happens to be held by the teacher in charge of that particular class. Often in colleges, young people with views that differ from their teachers are given poor grades simply on that basis. So if they want good grades, they’re forced to conform rather than being rewarded on the basis of their work and their ability to look at issues from all sides when forming their opinions.

Then, after being taught that independent thought is wrong, these people graduate and go out into the real world, where they find no end of political propaganda and religious social agendas to fill their deadened minds. They believe anything they’re told by these overly vocal groups because that’s what they’ve been conditioned to do. They’ve lost the ability to look at any issue rationally and with an inquisitive eye, because that’s the wrong thing to do. The right thing to do is to grab on to the political and religious dogma they’ve been spoon fed since birth and run with it. It doesn’t matter if their opinion is completely uninformed and hasn’t really been researched. They go along with whoever’s charismatic enough to pull them to their way of thinking. Again, they’ve been raised to be nothing more than sheep, being led around by the sheepherders of life.

Anyone who looks around themselves with an impartial eye would notice that the true independent thinkers in our society are the atheists and the Satanists. Why? Well, for two reasons. First, they’ve broken the religious bonds that shackled them and held back their independent thought. Atheists and Satanists actually have a lot in common, and in fact most Satanists are atheists. They think for themselves rather than following the preachings of some hypocritical religious leader. By releasing themselves from the dogma that was limiting their minds, they opened themselves up to all the possibilities in life, allowing them to see things from every angle, and to question their own beliefs and come to new conclusions that were arrived at independently rather than being influenced by any outside source.

The second reason comes down to the fact that once they’ve broken their religious bonds, they see the political and social propagandists for what they truly are, and refuse to allow themselves to be swayed by their words. Atheists and Satanists place an extremely high value on individuality and independence of thought, and refuse to let themselves be brainwashed by the constant flow of persuasions they’re inundated with every day.

The unfortunate thing is, those of us who are independent of though are surrounded by the masses of sheep. We’re the minority, and often have the will of the sheeple imposed upon us against our will. It’s an unfortunate fact of life, but unfortunately, it’s one we’re stuck with, and one that will never go away unless strict educational standards are set up, teachers who push their own agendas are fired immediately, and religion goes the way of the do do bird and the carrier pigeon.

So you can see the problem. Those things will never happen, and the world is becoming increasingly hostile to the true independent thinkers, because we don’t conform and we’re not part of the social and religious cliques that society forms around us. It’s not fair, but to be honest, I’d rather be shunned by everyone around me than to conform to their ignorance.

The free thinkers will always live as wolves amongst the sheep. Perhaps, as the years go on and science advances and people start to awaken more to the realities of life, the number of wolves amongst the sheep will slowly continue to grow until it is the sheep who live amongst a pack of wolves. It’s a nice thought, but I don’t see it happening for at least another few centuries…assuming we manage to survive that long as a species. Personally, I don’t hold out much hope for that.

I took a quiz to see which religion I was best suited for and it says I was best suited to be a Satanist, which is no big surprise considering that I am one. I never identified my belief system as anything other than just plain atheist until I read the Satanic Bible by Anton Szandor LaVey and discovered that it basically said all the things I had believed all my life.

For those who have been brainwashed by other religions into thinking Satanism is all about sacrificing children and animals, drug use, murder, and whatever else you’ve been led to believe…it’s not. It’s not the least bit about any of that, and the people who do get into things like that are shunned by true Satanists as nothing more than idiotic posers.

Before you condemn something you know nothing about, read up on it. You might be surprised how closely modern, non-theistic Satanism fits in with the belief system and behaviors you already have. It’s not about worshiping some entity, it’s about believing in yourself and striving to get the most out of life rather than constantly feeling guilty and feeling the need to confess and be forgiven because you actually got some small pleasure out of life.

Stupidity is the greatest sin in Satanism. So if you hate stupid people, you’re already half way there.

Anyway, here’s the results of the quiz I took. You should take it too, if for no other reason than to just relieve yourself of a little boredom.

Oh, and My wife Sharon took it too. You can see her results here in her blog.

Which religion is the right one for you? (new version)
created with QuizFarm.com

Ok, I don’t actually watch the show House. I’ll just say that right up front. I’ve seen bits and pieces here and there but I’ve never watched more than five or ten minutes of it.

That said, I do watch the commercials for it because they show them before and during American Idol, which I do watch.

Anyway, my wife made a comment about the show a while back, and I thought it was funny because I had never thought about it before. Basically, she said, “How come every in every episode he comes up against his biggest mystery yet, or his toughest case ever?”

Now every time I see a commercial for House, that’s all I can think about. Either this guy is the crappiest doctor ever, or just the unluckiest. Basically, either he slept through 90% of his classes and 95% of his residency, so that even a case of poison ivy would tax his medical abilities, or he’s just an awesome doctor who happens to have every poor schmuck with some funky new disease rolling into his hospital.

It seems like the whole premise of every show is, “Ok, how can we mess someone up so they’re worse than the poor schmuck in the last episode, without them actually being dead, just so we can keep saying it’s his toughest case ever?” Eventually they’re going to one-up themselves so far that he’ll actually be raising the dead. He’ll have to call in Dr. Herbert West from the Re-Animator movies as a consultant so he can learn how to make the re-animation serum, only he’ll improve upon Dr. West’s work so that the serum actually brings people back healthy and stuff.

Anyway, I just thought I’d mention it because I found it kind of amusing.

Speaking of American Idol, Jordin did awesome last night, but the judges spent the whole night kissing Melinda’s ass big time. Blake is just getting annoying. He’s a talented guy, but everything he does ends up sounding the same. He’s a one trick pony. The results were too close to call last night, so the one who leaves tonight is totally up for grabs. I’m thinking if it’s really close the producers will probably send Melinda home because she’s the least commercial of the three and a showdown between Jordin and Blake would bring them better numbers and more money than a Melinda and Jordin one.

Not taking anything away from Melinda here, she is a great singer. The problem is, she’d end up being like Reuben Studdard. She’d come out with one album and then disappear for a while, only to re-emerge with some gospel album or something that no one but her family would buy. The producers don’t want that. They want someone to win who’s commercial and can sell albums. Jordin and Blake fit the bill perfectly, so I REALLY wouldn’t be surprised to see Melinda going home tonight. I would however be surprised, and deeply saddened if Jordin goes home. Of the three, she has the brightest career ahead of her.

Ok enough about American Idol. Now it’s my time to bitch. Who the hell ever came up with the design for the main valve / back flow unit for sprinkler systems? Obviously it was some sadist who gleefully rolled back in his chair and spun around in circles waving his hands in the air in celebration of the monstrosity that he had just unleashed upon the world.

We didn’t have our sprinklers blown out last year because frankly we couldn’t afford it and they charge an arm and a leg to come blow them out. So it was decided we’d just take our chances on having a mild winter. Well we did, but the valve still froze, the bronze cracked and it leaked all over. Ok, dumb move on our part, but at least it was easy enough to replace…right? Um…no.

I call this one sprinkler place and the guy never calls me back. So screw him. Then I call this other place and talked to a really nice, honest guy. He told me that if I had him come out and do it, it would be about $385 bucks because he’s a contractor and would have to get a permit to do it and then have the work inspected by a plumber after. That’s just the law. Then he told me I could do it myself for about $80 bucks and that I could get everything I needed at Home Depot. So it’s now costing me more than twice what it would have cost to blow the sprinklers out myself. Ok, fine…whatever. So I take apart the old assembly, which was an absolute nightmare and broke one piece of it even more, and I took it into Home Depot so I’d know what parts to get. As he said, it all came to around $80.

I did have some questions while I was in there about how to do it, how to seal it properly, etc… I also needed help finding the valve. Now, Home Depot is always advertising how their helpful and friendly staff will help you sort out all of your household projects and what not. Let me just say, that whoever wrote those commercials, obviously never visited the Home Depot here in Boise.

If you’re LUCKY, you might find one employee in about every third or fourth isle you check. About 80 to 90% of the time, if they pass you in an isle while you’re looking around, they’ll just keep on walking and not even offer to help you find what you’re looking for. Not that you would have much of a chance of getting their attention anyway since they’re usually talking on their phones or radios.

When you actually reach the point where you just can’t find what you’re looking for, good luck finding anyone to ask. When someone is lucky enough to grab one of the orange vested home improvement elves, they help that person, relegating you to standing there waiting like an idiot for god knows how long until they finally finish up with that person. The thing is, you only get to ask Mr. or Ms. Orange Vest if you have your running shoes on, because as soon as they finish with that person, they take off running like someone set their ass on fire.

Then you see them all collected in various spots bullshitting about whatever fills their lives outside of work, which must be a considerable amount of stuff since work doesn’t seem to take up too much of their time.

Anyway, so I get the stuff and bring it home, and I’ll be damned if I can figure out how to put the thing together. It would have been SO simple if one of the ends on the connector piece had had reverse threads so I could just screw on the main valve and then put the connector piece between the two sides, turn it, and have them pull together in one fell, harmonious swoop. Turns out, it wasn’t that simple.

You have to turn the whole damn main valve two screw it onto the connector piece and screw the connector piece into the other side. Then the piece that comes up out of the ground screws into the bottom of the main valve. Somehow that piece coming up turns without going up or down. I’m not sure how that’s set up, but it sure as hell wasn’t obvious. It took me three days of messing around with it to figure out how the hell to put the damn thing back together, and then naturally the first attempt leaked at the connector piece, so I had to unscrew the main valve and put all my weight into trying to flip it one more time so it would screw on to the connector more. Finally I managed it and got everything together and it actually didn’t leak. By this time I practically had heat stroke, so I gathered up my tools meandered back into the house (my actual house…not the tv doctor), flopped out on the couch and had a nice cold soda, happy that I had finally solved the puzzle, but irritated as all hell that it needlessly had to be such a pain in the ass.

Man, why does everything in life have to be such a bitch?

I’m going to buy an air compressor and a blow out kit later on in the year and blow out my own sprinklers from now on. That way I don’t have to feel guilty about spending tons of money to do such an easy job every year, and I won’t have to deal with this crap again.

Anyway, that’s enough for now. I need to get back to sleep. It’s 4:44 am and I’ve been writing on this for a while, so I need to shuffle back off to dreamland before I lose out on the rest of my sleep time.

I was just sitting on the can, having some deep thoughts, as I usually do when I’m on the can, and I was thinking about the differences between men and women. I came up with some good ones, so I thought I’d share them with you.

* * *

Women love chocolate. Men love pizza.

Women love romantic comedies. Men love porn.

Women are sexy. Men are hairy.

Women want to make love with one special guy. Men want to have sex with lots of nameless women.

Women get pregnant. Men hope it isn’t theirs…unless of course they’re married to the pregnant woman in question, in which case they DO hope it’s theirs.

Women like to take bubble baths. Men don’t fit into the average bath tub, and the ones that do generally don’t take baths anyway because men prefer showers – at least the ones who actually bathe.

Women are emotional and think men are brutes because they’re not more emotional. Men are logical and think women are silly for being so emotional.

Women cook, clean, and do laundry. Men watch TV and scratch themselves.

Women love shoes and purses. Men couldn’t care less about shoes and purses.

Women don’t understand why their men are always checking out other women. Men check out other women because we’re men. That’s what we do.

Women like to redecorate. Men don’t care if women re-decorate, as long as they don’t touch our stuff.

Women load up the bathroom with make-up, stockings, hair care products, stuff to do their nails, grooming supplies, hair removers, etc… Men have deodorant, a razor and a toothbrush.

Women want to know if the outfit they’re wearing makes their butt look big. Men will tell women their butt doesn’t look big in that outfit because they don’t want to wait another twenty minutes for the woman to pick out another outfit and get changed, only to start the whole questioning process all over again.

Women claim they never fart. Men know for a fact that women fart and think it’s funny.

Women think men who are watching TV actually listen to what they’re saying. Men let women think that and simply mumble something now and then in a non-committal manner just to keep their women happy.

Women think men are like cavemen. Men are, and that’s the way we like it.

* * *

Anyway, that’s enough. I think you get the idea.

It’s 1:17am as I’m writing this. A few minutes ago I was sitting outside on the deck with my wife. It was dark, but with a noir-like light permeating the sky. The night air was crisp and mostly clear. On the table before us was a small clock radio, a portable heater, a mostly empty pitcher of iced tea, a mug of iced tea with ice and a straw and a small electric light with a stainless steel casing. The light is off though because it’s more relaxing to sit in the dark. My wife and I were sitting side by side at our small, round table with a blanket covering our backs so as to capture as much heat as possible from the portable heater.

The tranquility of the night was amazing. We live in town, and yet the outside environment was still and quiet, save for the occasional gusts of wind that would chill our bones and cause the large, flowered tree in our back yard to sway gently in its currents, much as seaweed shifts to and fro beneath the rhythmic waves of the sea.

It’s at times like these when my mind begins to drift, settling into contemplation of things that range from the esoteric to the fantastic. I found myself staring at the silhouettes created by the branches of the tree, and realized how cloud-like they are in their ability to form into shapes, both real and imagined as they draw the observer into their world of ever shifting realities. It’s like an escape, allowing you to step out of yourself and into a world where the only limits are the boundaries of your imagination.

The incoherent and the intangible are the stuff of dreams. What I experienced tonight had all the seeming of a lucid dream, filled with confusing, random imagery, and yet it was as real to me at that moment as anything one would experience in day to day life, much like the dream worlds we traverse in the deepest throes of our nightly slumber.

There are but a few perfect moments in this life. I count my experiences tonight as one of them, and I’m truly thankful for that. Hopefully, I will have more evenings like these, for there’s really no greater feeling of rest than when you allow your mind to step out of itself and experience things beyond the mundane, banalities of life.

I found this quote from George Carlin tonight and I thought it was amusing…

“Religion has convinced people that there’s an invisible man…living in the sky, who watches everything you do every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a list of ten specific things he doesn’t want you to do. And if you do any of these things, he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever, and suffer and burn and scream until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you and he needs money.”

Boogedy boogedy!