B-Movie Central Cheese Blog

TYLER, Texas

Pregnant mother Kim Hasler spoke of her horror yesterday after she bit into a McDonalds takeaway and crunched on a human tooth. Kim said she was nearly sick when she found the object which has now been sent away for analysis in a laboratory. “I went to bite into it and I heard a kind of crunch,” she said. ” There was this hard object in my burger. I took it out of my mouth and it was a tooth. “I could not believe it – I thought it might have been one of my teeth but I checked and it definitely wasn’t. “I was absolutely disgusted. It’s the most horrible thing I have ever eaten.” Kim, 18, said a friend bought the burger in a Happy Meal for her at a McDonalds take-away in Torquay, Devon. The shop is located near Torbay Hospital, where the mum-to-be was being treated for abdominal pains and early contractions. “This is the last thing I needed,” she said. “They wanted to take the tooth off me, but another customer overheard and told me to keep it for evidence. “Then they offered me a free meal which I thought was a cheek.” Kim, who lives in Torquay with boyfriend Steve Still, 33, a chef, and is expecting her baby in June, has contacted a solicitor and said she is considering legal action against McDonalds. In a letter, the fast food company apologised to Kim and repeated its request for her to send the object to them. A spokesman for McDonalds said: “We are extremely concerned to hear about Miss Hasler’s experience. We are currently investigating and our customer service department will liaise with her to resolve this.” Kim has passed the object to Torbay Environmental Health, which has sent it to a food technology laboratory for analysis. A council spokesman said: “We are following up a complaint and an investigation is ongoing.”

I can see that case going to court. “Miss Hasler, do you promise to tell the tooth, the whole tooth, and nothing but the tooth?”

NEW YORK

NEW YORK (AP) A Brooklyn music teacher was arrested after he allegedly hung a 5-year-old student by his belt loop in a classroom closet, police said. Jason Schoenberger, 24, was apparently playing a practical joke on another teacher at P.S. 279 in the Canarsie section when he hung the boy, police said. He was arrested on charges of reckless endangerment and endangering the welfare of a child at about 11:00 a.m. Monday, police said. The boy hung in the closet for several minutes. He was not hurt, said Officer Jennara Everleth, a police spokeswoman. Schoenberger has been assigned to administrative duties and could be barred from returning to the classroom if the charges prove correct, Education Department spokeswoman Margie Feinberg said.

Now you may think I’m going to award this teacher the moron of the day prize, but that’s not the case at all. My moron of the day award is going to whoever’s getting the green apple splatters over this thing. I mean, he hung the kid safely in the closet for a couple of minutes as a joke on the other teacher. Now personally I find this quite hilarious, and I’m sure he made sure the kid was securely fastened. So as far as I’m concerned, the only morons here are those who can’t see the humor in the joke.

MOSCOW, Idaho (AP) — Latah County Sheriff’s deputies had to cordon off their own parking lot after a man thought he was doing a good deed by bringing in a live grenade he found in an old farmhouse. Kenneth Faunce was helping to restore the farmhouse in Genesee on Sunday when he found the old grenade packed in a box filled with wood shavings. Rather than calling authorities, Faunce drove it to the sheriff’s office. He left it inside his car, which was isolated until the Explosive Ordnance Disposal Team from Fairchild Air Force Base could come take it away. Now the sheriff’s office is urging anyone who finds any type of explosive device to use extreme caution, leave it where it was found and contact local law enforcement.

Fortunately where I live here in Boise, we don’t have a lot of people finding hand grenades laying around. Then again, having a bunch of hand grenades laying around might be a good thing. It might just weed a lot of the stupid people out of the population.

Authorities in Norwalk have filed a child endangering charge against the parents of a one-year-old child who tested positive for marijuana. Twenty-eight-year-old Chandra Nopper and 21-year-old Christopher Pool were arrested yesterday following a Huron County Juvenile Court hearing in which their son was placed into the custody of his maternal grandparents. According to testimony, the grandparents were baby-sitting the child on March 26th when then noticed he was unusually quiet and his eyes appeared abnormal. When the boy was removed from a high chair, he staggered and fell to the floor while attempting to walk. The grandparents took him to a hospital emergency room where he tested positive for THC, a component of marijuana.

Oh my god that’s funny as hell. I mean it sucks that the baby got exposed to that, but when they say he staggered and fell to the floor when he tried to walk, all I get in my head is a mental image of me spining my neice around over and over again to get her dizzy and then watching her try to walk. It’s one of those things that when you hear about it you say, “Oh that’s terrible,” but when you actually see the kid staggering around it’s funny as hell. I wish this kid’s staggering had been as innocent as my neice’s. That kid should be taken away from those people and given to the grandparents permanently.

JACKSONVILLE, Fla. — A man in Jacksonville was seriously burned when he accidentally set off a commercial firework in his car that he apparently intended to throw at his girlfriend, according to a report. Investigators said the Shannon Kramer, 35, got into an argument with his girlfriend Sunday night on Herschel Street. Police said he later got into his car, and apparently lit the explosive with the intention of throwing it at his girlfriend, but the device dropped between his legs, WJXT-TV reported. “He light the fuse, which was long — they believe about 18 inches — but it was about a half-second burn time,” Jacksonville Sheriff’s Office Lt. Larry Gayle said. “He was prepared for the fuse to burn down that fast. He thought he had time to throw the device.” Neighbors who heard the explosion ran to the car, saw the man on fire and used a fire extinguisher to put out the flames. Kramer suffered burns to his legs and groin, and was taken to Shands-Jacksonville Medical Center. Jacksonville police said a passenger in the car fled after the blast. The bomb squad is still investigating, but it’s not known if Kramer will be charged with a crime.

This jerky bastard should totally be charged with something. I don’t care if he did get his weiner burned, he hasn’t suffered enough yet for what he was trying to do to that girl. I wish Darwinian law had taken over and removed this idiot from the gene pool permanently.

NEW YORK (AP) _ Descendants of slaves filed a $1 billion lawsuit against U.S. and British corporations on Monday, accusing them of profiting by committing genocide against their ancestors. Lawyers for the eight plaintiffs said the complaint _ unlike past suits seeking reparations for slavery _ was the first to use DNA to link the plaintiffs to Africans who suffered atrocities during the slave trade. The suit filed in federal court in Manhattan accuses Lloyd’s of London, FleetBoston and R.J. Reynolds of “aiding and abetting the commission of genocide” by allegedly financing and insuring the ships that delivered slaves to tobacco plantations in the United States. The defendants “have destroyed our national and ethnic identity,” one of the plaintiffs, Deadria Farmer-Paellmann, said at a news conference announcing the suit, which seeks $1 billion in punitive damages.

Funny how they’re not suing the descendants of the black African slave traders that traded their ancestors into slavery in the first place now isn’t it? Hey, sh*t happens. History is full of nasty things happening to people. Hell, if we really wanna take this all the way, how about the descendants of all the people Ghenghis Khan murdered go out and sue the country of Mongolia for messing up their lives. At some point, people just have to move on and deal with what life hands them instead of looking for excuses for why they’re a failure today. They don’t deserve money for that. If they worked hard and tried to achieve in life, they would have every chance that everyone else has in this world. Sitting around with a victim mentality gets you nothing.

PHNOM PENH (Reuters) – A Cambodian man cut off his penis when he said he was visited by four hungry spirits in a dream and he had no chicken or duck to offer them. According to police, 33-year-old Soun Ney told the spirits to go away when they first appeared to ask for food, and waved his pen*s at them in defiance. “Devils, I don’t have any chicken or duck for you,” he was quoted as saying by local police chief Phoeung Vat. “If you want to eat anything, you can eat my pen*s.” Soun Ney said the spirits agreed to eat his pen*s. He was rushed to a hospital near the capital Phnom Penh after he castrated himself with a butcher’s knife. “He is lucky to be alive,” Phoeung Vat told Reuters. Villagers in the deeply impoverished southeast Asian traditionally offer chicken, duck or cake to the spirits of the dead to ward off bad luck.

Man, that’ll teach him to not have some Ho Ho’s or Ding Dong’s in the cupboard when the spirits come a callin’.

Lorain police ordered a McDonald’s restaurant to close Saturday after an 18-year-old woman said she found laxatives in her soft drink. Officers said that the woman found three red gel-like tablets in her drink at the Oberlin Avenue McDonald’s and became ill. Police determined the tablets were laxatives. However, they couldn’t determine exactly where the pills were placed in the drink. The woman said she was sipping the drink when she sucked something through the straw. She took the lid off and found more pills inside the cup. She also said her 2-year-old daughter drank from the same drink. The woman told police where she got the drink. That’s when officers temporarily ordered the restaurant closed. It was shut down for about 25 minutes. Police are investigating the incident.

I always knew McDonald’s had “crappy” food, but jeez…